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Last year, my friend Jenna split from her partner after five years. She assumed they’d split their condo 50/50—until she learned Ontario’s common law rules don’t care about your IKEA receipts. Let’s break down what you need to know so your breakup doesn’t turn into a courtroom drama.
“We’re Basically Married, Right?” (Spoiler: No.)
Ontario’s common law relationship isn’t marriage-lite. It kicks in after three years of cohabitation or if you share a child and have a “relationship of permanence”. But here’s the kicker: You don’t get the same perks as legally married spouses.
A family lawyer once told me, “Common law isn’t a shortcut to marriage. It’s a legal gray zone—and gray zones love paperwork.” Translation? Without a marriage certificate, you’re not entitled to automatic property splits or survivor benefits.
Christine Van Geyn (@cvangeyn) explores the subtle transformation of relationships into common-law marriages through an insightful discussion with Ontario family lawyer Jessica Polis. This engaging conversation uncovers the legal nuances within Canadian justice, offering fresh perspectives on modern relationships.
When does a relationship turn into a common law marriage? The answer isn't as straightforward as you may think. I recently sat down with Ontario family lawyer Jessica Polis to discuss the question on Canadian Justice. pic.twitter.com/yk4sdliX4c
— Christine Van Geyn (@cvangeyn) October 21, 2024
3 Years or a Baby: When Ontario Says You’re “Official”
Think moving in together means Netflix-and-chill equals legal status? Not quite. The clock starts ticking after three years of shared bills and publicly acting like a couple. But if you have a kid? The rules fast-track you.
My cousin’s friend learned this the hard way. She and her partner had a baby after 18 months. When they split, Ontario’s Family Law Act treated them like common law spouses—no sunset walks required.
The Thinking Millennial (@Based_Atheist) offers a sharp critique of Ontario’s marriage and dating laws, highlighting how automatic common-law status after three years of cohabitation can impose unexpected financial burdens on men. These provocative insights invite readers to reconsider the legal landscape shaping modern relationships.
Ontario Canada has the worst laws for marriage/dating.
— (@Based_Atheist) February 1, 2024
If you live with someone for 3 years you’re automatically considered common law spouses and you will be expected to pay alimony.
Totally unlivable for men. https://t.co/N9ewZAw4wd
The Good, the Bad and the Ugly: Rights vs. Marriage
The Good
- Child support: Same as marriage.
- Spousal support: Courts treat you like married spouses if you meet the criteria.
The Bad
- Property division: Your name on the deed? It stays yours. No net family property splits unless a judge orders it.
The Ugly
- Without a cohabitation agreement, your ex could claim “unjust enrichment” for contributions (like paying for renovations).
Quick Cheat Sheet: Common Law vs. Marriage
- ✅ Shared: Child support, spousal support.
- ❌ Not shared: Automatic property splits, inheritance rights, tax breaks.
truisms are true (@TruismsT) offers a thoughtful perspective on family and marriage, emphasizing the importance of stable, secure unions that prioritize children’s well-being and long-term support over fleeting personal whims.
A marriage is a union between two people who work together to raise a family. I do think entering into this in a formal way adds more security, but what you’ve described about your parents is a common law marriage and thus subject to the same protections after two years anyway.…
— truisms are true (@TruismsT) February 16, 2025
How to Lose Half Your Stuff in 10 Years
Let’s say you buy a house. Your partner pays utilities for a decade. If you split, they might argue they deserve a cut through constructive trust (fancy term for “I helped build this”).
A colleague’s ex did exactly that. They’d renovated the kitchen together, but only his name was on the deed. The ex sued for beneficial interest, claiming they’d enriched the property. They settled out of court—after maxing a credit card on legal fees.
Moral: Protect assets with a cohabitation agreement.
Cohabitation Agreements: Not Romantic, But Smarter
Think of it as a prenup for your shared dog and Netflix account. A cohabitation agreement outlines:
- Who keeps the house?
- How to split debts.
- Whether your vintage record collection is sacred.
A lawyer friend puts it bluntly: “Love fades. Paperwork doesn’t.”
Proving You’re a Team (Even If You Forget Anniversaries)
Ontario’s courts want proof you’re a real couple. Use:
- Joint bank accounts (even for groceries).
- Shared bills (hydro, Wi-Fi, that gym membership you never use).
- Social media posts (“Date night!” counts).
One couple even used vacation photos and their dog’s vet bills to prove their relationship of permanence.
The Takeaway: Protect Your Couch, Your Kids, and Your Sanity
Common law in Ontario isn’t about love—it’s about logistics. Jenna’s now a paperwork evangelist. “Get a cohabitation agreement,” she says. “And document everything. Even the dog’s vet bills.”
So, before you merge your lives, merge your legal strategy. Your future self will thank you.
Last Updated on by Saket Kumar
